10 signs it’s real vs. 10 signs you’re just bored and on vacation.
We all love a little romance when the weather heats up. A sun-kissed situationship. A 2am swim. Kissing someone who smells like sunscreen and emotional instability. It’s giving The Notebook — if Noah had commitment issues and Allie was still talking to her ex.
But let’s be so for real: not every summer fling is a love story. Sometimes it’s just two unhealed people using each other for validation until the weather changes.
So how do you know if it’s love or a full-blown trauma bond with matching bathing suits? Let’s unpack it.
💌 10 Signs It’s Summer Love (aka the good kind of delulu):
1. You feel calm, not chaotic.
Butterflies are cute — but anxiety in a crop top? Not so much.
2. You’re not trying to decode texts.
No “what did he mean by that.” No notes app drafts. Just vibes and clarity.
3. You actually like who you are when you’re with them.
They don’t bring out your inner FBI agent — they bring out your inner peace.
4. You’re not ignoring red flags for aesthetics.
You love the rooftop pics, but not enough to justify the emotional whiplash.
5. You trust them even when your phone is on Do Not Disturb.
You’re not low-key hoping they’ll “accidentally” bump into your Story.
6. You talk about the future without spiraling.
Even if it’s just brunch next week, it doesn’t feel scary to plan.
7. They know your real name and your go-to coffee order.
The bare minimum is being met. Congratulations!
8. You don’t feel like you need to “perform” to keep them interested.
You can be chill, emotional, sweaty, sarcastic — and they’re still obsessed.
9. You feel seen, not just complimented.
They don’t just say you’re pretty — they notice you.
10. Your journal isn’t just about them.
You’re growing with them, not because of them.
😬 10 Signs It’s Giving Trauma Bond in a Bucket Hat:
1. It escalated way too fast.
You met Tuesday. You trauma dumped by Thursday. Now you’re posting beach pics on Saturday like it’s love.
2. You’re obsessed with how it looks, not how it feels.
You have more couple photos than actual conversations.
3. You’re scared to say the wrong thing.
Because deep down, you know the whole thing is a house of cards.
4. You’re bonding over shared pain, not shared values.
If your whole connection is “we’ve both been hurt before,” it’s not a foundation — it’s a coping mechanism.
5. You’re ignoring your friends.
And if you’re being honest… they’re kind of worried.
6. Your gut says something’s off, but your fantasy says “shhh.”
Delusion is loud. Your intuition is louder.
7. You confuse drama with passion.
Fighting one minute, kissing the next — that’s not chemistry, that’s chaos.
8. You’re already planning how to get over them… while still dating them.
Enough said.
9. Your nervous system is working overtime.
You’re not in love. You’re in survival mode with cute highlights.
10. You keep saying, “It’s just for the summer.”
Except you’ve said that every summer since 2019.
🏁 The Takeaway
Look, there’s nothing wrong with a short-term spark. But if it’s draining you, confusing you, or making you spiral more than usual, it’s probably not love. And you deserve more than temporary affection masked as emotional intensity.
Summer love should feel safe. Soft. Supportive.
Not like a test you keep failing with glitter on your face.
So go ahead — flirt in the sun, kiss in the moonlight. Just don’t lose yourself trying to chase a feeling that isn’t even real.
And if it ends? Let it.
You’re still the main character, babe. The credits haven’t even rolled yet.
